Narcissistic girl stuck in my head

I helped a girl last year and was quite selfless in doing so. I saw she was manipulative about things after I started helping her. Before we were just two people with similarities in life and the same age from the same boring city and so on. She never hinted at needing anything ever and we just talked as two people attempting to be friends. However, when we first met I thought we were similar and had similar issues. Turns out she will use any tactic to get what she wants whether gaslighting to misdirect or attempt to confuse and put blame anywhere but at her doorstep. She is so defensive over any slight she’ll hold it for life: she cried narcissist. I’ve known many and she checks about every box. I want to believe she’s not but I’ve known so many. She uses the kid excuse constantly for everything and her kids don’t even live with her which I didn’t find out till later. She blames her ex-husband for everything when it’s obvious it’s her. There are huge red flags everywhere and a manipulative person as a whole and greedy like a mofo. Despite all this, I find myself liking her and thinking I must be insane. A sucker oh yes but I knew or sensed what she likely was. I cannot get her out of my head. One, because she owes me and made a promise (though I rarely collect) and she’d never think to now after we parted ways as we don’t mesh. It’s because I’m not a follower and simplistic she wants and needs things to be when she’s a train wreck too. I’m no saint either but I’ve never acted like she does. I feel crazy for liking her despite knowing how bitter and controlling she is. I believe she had to have been mega spoiled when younger and once popular and is bitter at an older age as a single mom despite living alone. She’s good no doubt about that and is pretty so she can fool you, but if you pay attention you’ll know she’s so off and alone. I can’t stop thinking about her because she owes me and I feel cheated hence a narcissist but also I liked her before she got all greedy. It’s what they do and are but I find myself trying to make her more human like the honest crying sad one I met who lost her job for doing something stupid. It’s obvious what’s going on here but I can’t get her out of my head. I feel cheated because I stupidly helped her for months thinking she was just going through some emotional hell without her meds which I know she was as I’m on meds but she also is a bitter b**ch if a girl. I’d like to have my mind wiped of her but I know I’m screwed. She wins but who’s next? I don’t envy them.

narcissistic-girl in-my-head

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